–by Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW, originally published on the author’s blog, September 14, 2017 “The problem with verbal abuse is there is no evidence,” Marta shared. She came for help with a long-standing depression. “What do you mean lack of evidence?” I asked her. “When people are physically or sexually abused it’s concrete and real. But verbal abuse is amorphous. I feel like if I told someone I was verbally abused, they’d think I
–by Lorraine Fuller It’s a feeling special needs parents know all too well. My most recent experience happened on a cruise ship, on a vacation with extended family. One evening, I couldn’t sleep. My son had gone to a teen party and everyone else had gone to bed early or was off doing something else. I went walking and decided to get a slice of pizza – 24-hour pizza is one of the perks of
–by Hilary Jacobs Hendel Manager’s note: another great post from therapist and writer Hilary Jacobs Hendel, originally published back in July. Many people carry the same wounds Mike has. Kids impacted by trauma carry them at least a thousand-fold. This post helps understand how they feel and gives ideas of tools can help. Click here to learn more about Hilary’s work on The Change Triangle and her forthcoming book, It’s Not Always Depression, from Random House Press.
–by Janyne McConnaughey, PhD I sat on the floor next to her. I understood her fear of abandonment, the trauma she had experienced, and how her mother had been unable to provide any form of comfort. I watched her body shake uncontrollably and offered a blanket. I knew she would not want me to hold her. As we sat, I thought about how this had all started the day she was born. My cognitive understanding
–by Janyne A. McConnaughey, Ph.D. originally published June 21, 2017 on Janyne’s blog I stood in the doorway. I was very small, maybe two. I was sucking on my two middle fingers and watching my mother in the kitchen. I was forbidden from entering. Then I did the unthinkable. I stepped over the imaginary line and asked for a cookie. The response was not a positive one, but what strikes me most is how I felt
–by Julie Beem I read about some interesting research on praise in an educator’s blog that cited a study done by Dr. Carol Dweck of Stanford on praising 5th graders. (These were neurotypical 5th graders, BTW.) The experiment went like this. They gave 400 5th graders a simple puzzle in which everyone did well and was praised. Half the group was praised with “you’re so smart,” and the other half with “you must have worked
by: Gari Lister Most schools in Dallas started Monday, and my Facebook feed is full of happy children getting ready for their first day of school. My own daughter started last week — on Wednesday, of all weird days — and somehow I missed posting her picture (so of course I’m embarrassing her by posting it here). But if I’m honest, maybe it wasn’t a mistake. I know summers are really hard for lots of
by: Craig Peterson All children need a special activity in their lives – something to call their own. And especially those who’ve experienced trauma. Many of these opportunities happen through school. For some it’s team sports. For others it might be music or theater. In the case of my son Andrew, he found his niche through running. Like thousands of children each year – in spite of 25 years of awareness, his birth mother drank
by: Craig Peterson Looking back to my elementary school years, I was lucky. Learning came easy. Fast forward 30 years. My children were struggling at school. When a flyer came home about a school workshop, I jumped at the chance to gain additional knowledge. Several weeks later I encountered a roomful of overwhelmed mothers. Within ten minutes I had an entirely new take on parental frustration. “My daughter’s behind her peers in everything,” said one
by: D. Craig Peterson
My son Andrew recently had a week to shine at the Special Olympics USA Games – a personal success years in the making. And now three gold medals to his name!
I will never forget how far he has come.
In second grade he was the boy often confined to “the post” at recess. Not because he wanted to be bad but because he didn’t understand the rules of many games on the playground – he often accidentally pushed his peers.